It’s no secret that when any book is made into a movie, the film is going to blow if you’ve read the book first. But, is it possible that a film made into a novel could actually be better than the movie? I think so, and as proof, I offer Jerrod Balzer’s novelization of a William Winckler screenplay, The Double-D Avenger.
Released through Skullvines Press, this comedy of Double-D proportions is about Chastity Knott, a woman who runs the most successful pub in town. But after a breast exam reveals that she has cancer, she closes up shop to travel to South America in search of an erotic cousin of the banana that has magical healing properties. But that’s not all it does, as Chastity soon learns that she has superpowers thanks to the Crockazilla plant.
Upon returning home, her celebration is cut short by the evil plots of Al Purplewood (snort) who runs a bikini bar across town. Al sends his three sinister strippers to bump the chesty Chastity off, and instead, Greek goddess Hydra Heffer shoots and kills Chastity’s cowpoke suitor Bubba Olympian. This leads Chastity to swear to use her powers to bring to justice the trio of Hydra, a former pirate named Pirate Jugs and a thawed out cavewoman, Ooga Boobies.
The battles in the book are truly of Tit-anic proportions, and with a plot like this, you can expect breast jokes to be overrunning the bra cups. Being a fan of puns, this book worked for me quite well, since I was alternating between giggling or groaning at the jokes. (Groaning in a good way, mind you.)
Jerrod’s sense of humor actually helps make the script even better as he fills in gaps in the histories of the characters, which weren’t covered in the movie. One of the best jokes involves a scientist dying of a heart attack, and another involves the sexual molest of a stuffed bear.
Fans of schlock comedy will find very little to complain about, and as adaptations of screenplays go, this helps to make a goofy comedy into a solid page turner where the only pauses you’ll make will be to laugh or groan at the jokes.
I give The Double-D Avenger four stars and recommend it to anyone looking for the breast, er the best in comedy entertainment.…